I was talking previously about what we need to know about self-love and how it affects ALL our relationships. To be honest the word ‘self-love’ gets thrown around a lot and gets misunderstood. When I say ‘self-love’ to clients, many of them think its about being arrogant, selfish and even narcissistic but, in my opinion, it’s the exact opposite of that.
Self-love and self-care go very much hand in hand together, in that self-care is a very crucial form of self-love. You can’t have one without the other and it’s important to understand that self-love is more than just feeling good about yourself, being confident or taking care of yourself.
Self-love is a very deep respect, admiration and belonging for and to yourself. It is unconditionally accepting yourself as you are and having compassion for yourself.
I’d like to share with you 4 tips that you can use to set you on the path to developing self-love in your life now.
1. Know That You Are Worth Loving.
There is no need to rely on anyone else to tell you that you are worth loving or in fact you are worth anything. The only person’s opinion of you that really matters, is your own opinion of yourself. You are so worth it and have been placed here to do amazing things.
There is no need for you to change for anyone or anything. The only changes you should make are those that YOU see as benefitting YOU! Changes that relate to your own personal growth and development. Love yourself just the way you are.
2. Stop Comparing Yourself To Others.
Comparisonitis is the ultimate killer of self-love, self-esteem and indeed self-confidence. Unfortunately in this Instagram perfect world, it’s very easy to fall into the trap of comparisonitis. I mean, the reality is these posts are only showing the best parts. People very rarely post their struggles, trials and the negative aspects of their lives. And, believe me they will have them, we all do.
It’s ok to look, but the problem occurs when we start to compare ourselves or our lives to these people, and then talking ourselves down. Focus on being present in your own life rather than being so focused on everyone else’s. Something that may help is to take a social media break, or unfollow the accounts that make you compare yourself or even think negatively of yourself.
3. Commit To Loving Yourself Today.
There is no need to wait until you make whatever personal growth changes you’re looking to make before you start to love yourself. There is never a RIGHT time, there is only NOW.
Commit to love yourself now as you are. Making that conscious decision to love yourself now will actually make it easier for you to work towards your personal development dreams, desires and goals. YOU ARE WORTH.
4. Forgive Yourself.
Change our mindset from punishing yourself with thoughts like ‘I’m not good enough’ or comparing yourself to learning and growing from your past experiences. You may call these ‘mistakes’. I only consider them a ‘mistake’ if you don’t learn from them.
A good exercise to help with this is to write down all your thoughts and or past actions that are bothering you or that you regret. Then, safely burn that piece of paper. This exercise symbolises letting go of the past and forgiving yourself. Practice self-love and self-compassion by letting go of these negative or toxic thoughts and by forgiving yourself.
Next time, I’ll be sharing another 4 tips on how to develop self-love. Until then, keep well and stay safe.
If you’d like more information, grab a cuppa and hop on a no-obligation call to find out how I can help and, more importantly, if I’m the right person for you.